I go by Magikarp online, even though my actual name is cooler. I'm from Canada and I still live here, I pass time by making glitch art and attempting Lua and losing interest. I don't talk about how long I've been programming or what my expertise is, because while I under how programs are structured, I never invest the time to actually pick it up and get into a groove.
I'm currently using a TI-83+ on a project similar to Oregon Trail, sans graphics, and obviously simplified in other ways.
I look forwards to groaning about all my problems in the future!